Tag: Narcissist

Why Jezebels and Narcissits Spoil Every Holiday and How to Keep Your Peace

You may know one – or have known one. The Killjoy, the Jezebel or the Naracissit who consistantly ruins every holiday. It may be a birthday, a Thanksgiving, or even Christmas.  Every year they make a scene – to be seen. It’s almost like they are on steroids. All those criticizing, belittling, and blaming behaviors come out in stereo. Loud and proud as they cut down everyone and everything in their way. But why? Why do they insist on the drama every Holiday? And more importantly, what can you do to keep your peace?

holiday narcissist 2.jpg

 

Why Jezebels and Narcissists Spoil Every Holiday and How to Keep Your Peace

  • Jezebels and Narcissits have a self control problem. They have none. So they create drama all around them so they feel important. It’s all about them. They want to be the star of the show. So if they cut you down, they think they shine.
    •  It’s a pretty dull sparkle if you ask me. Don’t react. Let them be stupid all by themselves.
  • Holidays bring crowds and they love to be the star of the show. Once again, you don’t matter to them. They have no real heart. It is cold and closed. More people mean a bigger audience for them to play their leading role.
    • They are a legend in their own minds.  Too bad it’s the size of a pea, lol! They think they are God and everyone should bow down and worship them. Don’t do it. Don’t put them on a pedestel, or cater to their whims. There is no throne for that type of behavior. It’s abusive.
  • Jezebels and Narcissists are insecure –  only they don’t want anyone to know about it. They often overreact to the dumbest things. They will blow a gasket at the drop of a hat, over anything. They are maniupulaters and blamers. In their mind anything that goes wrong is never their fault. They think they walk on water.
    • They will blame whoever is in their way. This way they feed their own ego. You can almost see their head blow up with their own hot air. When the blaming starts, take a deep breath and don’t belive them. Whatever comes out of their mouth is not true. They lie to cover things up all the time. Half of the time they do not even remember all the lies they tell.
  • Jezebesl and Narcissists  love to stir up drama. Have you ever noticed how they will poke and prod and gossip just to get someone upset? It makes them feel in control. They love to get other people angry.  I really think anger is fuel to them. They thrive on it.
    • Don’t play. Don’t react. Let their words fall to the ground.  Just because they said something doesn’t mean it is true. Sometimes this makes them even angrier, be prepared. It’s healthy to walk away, take a break, leave the room. You don’t have to watch them crash and burn.

Keep you peace this Holiday. If they want to be a jerk, let them. We have no contorl over other people’s bad behavior. It is not our fault they are jerks, that is their choice. What we can control is our reaction to it.

“Don’t feed the Jezebel or the Narcissist – they will only get uglier.”

Remember to put on your full armor and stand strong. Let it go, God will deal with them just like He did with Jezebel. Keep your peace. Don’t play. Pray, ask God to intercede. He will, and watch the Jezebels fall!

narcissist

 

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Some People Are Just Psycho

I turned on the news this morning and the broadcasters are still searching for the “why”. Why did that man shoot all this people in Las Vegas? We may never know. They are interviewing the brother, the girlfriend, etc. We hear stories of how his dad was a bank robber and stuff.

Can I just say, there is no “why” –  because some people are just plain psycho.

Serial killers do not have a logical reason for doing what they do, they are psycho. Their brains are just plain messed up. Things are not working right upstairs. There is no right or wrong in their mind, they are Narcissists. In their mind they are God. They have no moral compass, no sense of regret or remorse, and nothing will make sense to us.  There is no logical reason for what they do. Their heats are hard and cold and dark.

How does this happen? All sorts of reasons I am sure.  That doesn’t excuse what they do. Wrong is wrong and we have justice for a reason. Our courts and jails are full of many psychos, they are just not right. Normal people do not just kill people. Normal people don’t have that many guns, or sneak them up to a hotel suite.  Normal poeple  would not kill all those other people like that.  God knows, God saw, and God will take care of that killer.

God’s Wrath on Unrighteousness

For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness,  because what may be known of God is manifest in them, for God has shown it to them.  For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse,  because, although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened.  – Romans 1:18-21 NKJV

evil

Here are the traits of what a Psychopath looks like:

psychopath

Dear Lord, be with the victims, and their families. Give them peace and healing and hope. You know how we hate tragedy. We have evil just like you Lord. You know, fix it Lord, in Jesus name, amen.

 

 

 

 

Jezebel Abuses Grace

The spirit of Jezebel loves to control others and take advantage of any situation. I have know many people in my life who have displayed this type of personality. You know the type:  their way or the highway, always two faced, constantly a drama queen. They love to be the center of attention and will sacrifice others to get the admiration of who they desire.  Sometimes people call them Narcissists.

Have you ever run into this kind of person?

Jezebels abuse grace. Give them an inch and they will take a mile. There is no grace with a Jezebel. There is no love, no loyalty, no honor.  They will be nice to you in one moment and then turn around and gossip behind your back. You will feel the knife go in as they do it. Then they will walk over like nothing happened.  No wonder God wants us to get rid of this spirit.

God gave her time to repent – she did NOT want to. Lets be real. Jezebels get what they want by manipulation and control. They do not want to change. It is working for them. The like feeling superior and better than – and they will ‘kill’ anyone who gets in their way.  They lie, they cheat, they steal, they slander, they gossip, they set up master plans to destroy – whatever it takes to get their way.

In the Bible Jezebel even killed to get her way. She set up a scheme to get Naboth killed so she could have his vineyard. See 1 Kings 21 for the whole story. There is always a plan with this type of person. They thrive on manipulation.

My point here – there is no grace with Jezebel – unless it’s part of a bigger plan. Beware my friends. There is always more to the story when this spirit is involved.

source: watchmanreports.com

To the church in Thyatira
‘To the angel of the church in Thyatira write:
These are the words of the Son of God, whose eyes are like blazing fire and whose feet are like burnished bronze. I know your deeds, your love and faith, your service and perseverance, and that you are now doing more than you did at first.


Nevertheless, I have this against you: you tolerate that woman Jezebel, who calls herself a prophet. By her teaching she misleads my servants into sexual immorality and the eating of food sacrificed to idols. I have given her time to repent of her immorality, but she is unwilling. So I will cast her on a bed of suffering, and I will make those who commit adultery with her suffer intensely, unless they repent of her ways. 23 I will strike her children dead. Then all the churches will know that I am he who searches hearts and minds, and I will repay each of you according to your deeds. – Revelation 2: 18- 23 NKJV

 

 

A Day in the Life-Quotes on Narcissism

A typical conversation with a Narcissist:

I said, “Stop calling me. I don’t want to talk about it.”

He said, “I will but I wanted to tell you how I feel about it.”

I answered, “I don’t care how you feel about it.”

Click. He hangs up the phone.  Two minutes later the texts start. He texts, “why don’t you practice what you preach?” I didn’t bite. I knew he was baiting me. I didn’t respond. They really hate that.

Two minutes later another text. I won’t repeat that one – lots of swear words. Again, I didn’t respond.A minute later the phone rings again. I can’t believe he’s still trying to call. No means no. I don’t answer again. I don’t want to participate in his drama.

I sit back down in my favorite chair. Take a deep breath and start to relax. Them I hear it from down the hall. He calls one of the kids. Great…here we go…

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Quotes on Narcissism

  1. “The sadistic narcissist perceives himself as Godlike, ruthless and devoid of scruples, capricious and unfathomable, emotion-less and non-sexual, omniscient, omnipotent and omni-present, a plague, a devastation, an inescapable verdict.” ― Sam Vaknin
  2. “Narcissistic personality disorder is named for Narcissus, from Greek mythology, who fell in love with his own reflection. Freud used the term to describe persons who were self-absorbed, and psychoanalysts have focused on the narcissist’s need to bolster his or her self-esteem through grandiose fantasy, exaggerated ambition, exhibitionism, and feelings of entitlement.” ― Donald W. Black, DSM-5 Guidebook: The Essential Companion to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders
  3. “Hate is the complement of fear and narcissists like being feared. It imbues them with an intoxicating sensation of omnipotence.” ― Sam Vaknin, Malignant Self Love: Narcissism Revisited
  4. “To focus on how I’m doing more than what Christ has done is Christian narcissism” ― Tullian Tchividjian, Jesus + Nothing = Everything
  5. “The ‘Selfie Stick’ has to top the list for what best defines narcissism in society today.” ― Alex Morritt, Impromptu Scribe
  6. “There’s a reason narcissists don’t learn from mistakes and that’s because they never get past the first step which is admitting that they made one. It’s always an assistant’s fault, an adviser’s fault, a lawyer’s fault. Ask them to account for a mistake any other way and they’ll say, ‘what mistake?” ― Jeffrey Kluger 
  7. “Relationships with narcissists are held in place by hope of a “someday better,” with little evidence to support it will ever arrive.” ― Ramani Durvasula, Should I Stay or Should I Go?: Surviving a Relationship with a Narcissist
  8. “Here lies the partner’s salvation: if you, as his intimate, wish to sever your relationship with the narcissist, stop providing him with what he needs. Do not adore, admire, approve, applaud, or confirm anything he does or says. Disagree with his views belittle him, reduce him to size, compare him to others, tell him he is not unique, criticize him, give unsolicited advice, and offer him help. In short, deprive him of the grandiose and fantastic illusions, which holds his personality together.  The narcissist is a delicately attuned piece of equipment. At the first sign of danger to his inflated False Self, he will quit and disappear on you.” ― Sam Vaknin, Malignant Self Love: Narcissism Revisited

 

(Image credits- Pinterest)

Characteristics of psychopaths | The Tyranny of Psychopaths

“They lie, cheat, steal, and kill to get their way. For them, it is a practical matter.” How I wish someone had taught me these things before I started dating for the first time. Life was always a game with men like this and they would do anything to win. Lesson learned.

No Psychos, No Druggies, No Stooges

Psychopathy causes more social social distress and disruption than all other mental disorders combined.Power elite psychopaths can be charming, charismatic, and intelligent. They are often seen as great leaders. They have powerful personalities with an almost a hypnotic ability to persuade and command people to do what they want. They can be smart, even scary smart—but in a devious, Machiavellian way. They are con artists who present a false image to the world, an image that they know will gain favorable attention.

Their emotional life consists of the gratification of acquiring, consuming, and possessing the best of everything, the thrill of conquest, the frustration of losing a fight, the triumph of defeating enemies, and the glory of egomania.

But above all, they live to conquer and to win. Psychopaths love battles—for them, it is a game. They go from one challenge to the next. They love winning and prizes, recognition and fame. They love privileges and exclusive clubs. They believe they are entitled…

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Predatory People and Toxic Relationships

My rant to a harassing person from my past that will not respect my NO:

Not everyone is our friend. There are those people who are alongside the Enemy and just wish to kill, steal, and destroy. There is good, and there is evil. Learning to discern the difference between the two has been a journey for me. Evil people don’t wear horns and carry pitchforks. Sometimes they dress and act just like you and pretend to be a friend. So you try to help. Invite them in. And wonder why you got bit from the wolf 6 months later! There are Predatory People out there.

 The Bible teaches us that you will know a tree by its fruit. And some trees are bad. No amount of tlc will change it. Learning that I am not the Savior was a hard lesson for me. I kept getting myself into toxic relationships with Drama Kings and Queens until I learned to say NO. 

No, You don’t get to pretend to be my friend and stab me in the back at the same time. 

No, I will not allow you to treat me disrespectfully time after time and pretend it never happened. 

No, don’t expect me to believe a word that you say when all I hear are lies. 

No, you are not my friend and I do not have to let you back into my life. 

For the dog that keeps knocking on my door and trying to bully their way back in – NO. 

   
I forgave you, God commands me to do that. That doesn’t mean you get to come over and have lunch like nothing happened. God also gives us wisdom. 

Forgiveness does not mean that I accept what you did to me and my family. IT WAS WRONG. And you treated many others in your life the same way. I can’t believe we all believed the same lies. Wouldn’t you at least change your story? Playing the same ‘ruse’ is so sad. 

Forgiveness means that I trust God to deal with you. I am not your Savior. He is. I will not ‘tie’ myself to you in friendship. You do not know what that word means. Nor do I think you even care. In my opinion you are a Narcissist. All about you, all the time. They have real counselors that may be able to help you with that. Not me. Not my job.

I tried to help, but you only used that as an opportunity to attack. I will protect myself and my family from Predators. And I respect myself  and my family enough to say NO. 

Stop harassing me. No more emails, no more friend requests to me or my children, no more stopping by to damage anything where I live. Go live your life and leave me and my family out of it. 

  
  

(Image credits- simple reminders.com, ilovemylsi.com, Pinterst)

12 Steps to Keeping Your Sanity When You Are Sleeping With the Enemy

Keeping your sanity – when you are sleeping with the enemy. Let me share a story. I came to the Lord during a time of crisis in my life. Isn’t that how it goes? Anyway, I was charmed by the ‘snake’ just like Eve in the garden. His talk was smooth, he was absolutely charming, but underneath he was a snake.  I lived many years in Domestic Abuse and little did I know that this was the start of a very destructive relationship. And, it has happened to me more than once  – more than one relationship.

The World calls him the Abuser,

the Doctors call him the Narcissist,

and the Church calls him the Jezebel Spirit.  

It’s all about deception, and ultimately power and control.

And you my friend are the target if you fall for his lies.

dont fall for it

 

Recently I got an email from a follower asking for action steps on how to keep your sanity in the middle of the mess. Thank you my friend for the inspiration.  Here is my experience.

 

12 STEPS TO KEEPING YOUR SANITY

WHEN YOU ARE SLEEPING WITH THE ENEMY

 

  1. Accept the fact that you have been deceived. The dream was a nightmare. It was not what you thought, and that’s ok. The truth will set you free.

  2. Ask God to help you and read His Word. Only the Truth will cut through the lies.

  3. Ask God to reveal where you have been lied to. And get ready for tears as God shows you.

  4. Once the Holy Spirit shows you, give yourself permission NOT to confront the Abuser/Narcissist/Enemy. You don’t have to prove yourself right. God is showing you, not him. And seriously, he doesn’t care – he doesn’t want to.

  5. Start a journal. Write down what happens. Find a scripture verse to hold onto for the situation and write that down too. I had a tendency to forget what happened with living from crisis to crisis. Seeing it down on paper over time made it real for me.

  6. Give yourself permission to NOT change him. It is not your job. And he probably doesn’t even want to change. He thinks he is right – all the time.

  7. Give yourself some space and time. Not everything has to be decided today.

  8. Seek out professional support. I had help from the Pastor, church friends, Counselors, and a few friends.

  9. Start to reestablish your independence – quietly if you are still living in the same house. Start looking for a job, call someone, read a motivational book. Reignite the flame that he has blown out. You can do it.

  10. Ask God to put a barrier between you and the Abuser/Narcissist/Enemy. Every time I saw the Abuser I pictured mirrors all around me. That way anything he said bounced right back to him.

  11. If you are married, ask God for wisdom. God did not create you to be abused. Spiritual abuse, financial abuse, emotional abuse, or physical abuse are NOT what marriage is. I had to separate with my ex. And he still did not want to change. With his repeated unfaithfulness we eventually divorced. It was messy, yes, but today I live in peace.

  12. Yes, pray for him. Whether he changes or not, it will free you. Forgiveness does not mean what he did was right, but it frees you from the baggage and allows God to deal with him. There is such freedom in letting go of trying to change him. Let go of the strings my friends, God will take it from here.

I found a wonderful image of what this looks like from The Narcissists Wife.

 

Source - http://www.narcissistswife.com/19-signs-married-to-a-narcissist/
Source – http://www.narcissistswife.com/19-signs-married-to-a-narcissist/

 

(Other images from Pinterest)

Raise Up the Elijahs to Defeat the Jezebels

There are Elijahs and Jezebles in this world. And it’s a battle for power. It may be at work, at home, or at church – but these spirits are present. God tells us to test the spirits. Not every spirit is from God. And not every spirit is friendly.

I recently received an interesting comment on a blog post about Jezebel. You can read it here – STOP TOLERATING THE JEZEBEL SPIRITA person thought that the Spirit of Jezebel was just about sex. I have not found that to be true. Yes, the Spirit of Jezebel uses her sexuality to control others, but it’s more than that. So today I thought I would compare and contrast these two spirits.

Leave me a comment if you think of more characteristics to add to these – thanks!

elijah name
Source – KimberosePhotography

 

Spirit of Elijah

  • Stands up for truth and is bold and fearless

  • Has intimate relationship with God and receives instruction from God. (See 2 Kings 9)

  • Has the God given Authority to overthrow and overturn Jezebel and her kingdom

  • Is a Prophet and sees the future and declares it

  • Is a Minister of Fire and destroys the enemies of the Kingdom of God (See 1 Kings 18)

  • Confronts Jezebel and her blind followers

 

 

Source – churchofjezebel.com

Spirit of Jezebel

  • Seeks her own agenda. She is bold and fearless as well.

  • Uses Power and Control to manipulate and destroy others

  • Mocks God and His people

  • Uses Witchcraft and other dark arts

  • Puts herself on the throne and sees herself as God

  • Sets up her own false kingdom where the subjects worship her

  • Kills, steals, and destroys anyone who does not agree with her

 

Note to self – Elijahs and Jezebels can be men or women. Its not about gender – it’s a spirit.

 

2 Kings 9

 

As a body of Believers, let us pray for the Lord to raise up the Elijahs to defeat the Jezebels in our Churches, our Schools, our Workplaces and our Homes. Show us your glory Lord, and RAISE UP THE ELIJAHS TO DEFEAT THE JEZEBELS, in Jesus Name.

 

RELATED POSTS

 

 

 

(Featured Image Source – https://ddclaywriter.wordpress.com/2013/07/28/elijah-going-postal-on-prophets-but-running-scared-from-jezebel/)

Sweetie, It’s Not You, Your Dad is a Narcissist

This blog is a letter to my children. I have been married to 2 Narcissists in my life. The Church calls them Jezebel Spirits. Here is my life lesson. In my opinion a Narcissist does not know what love is. It is always all about them. We are not people – we are possessions. And in his eyes, we are here to bow down and worship him.  (sorry to be so blunt, but it’s true.)

NARCISSIST

1. a person who is overly self-involved, and often vain and selfish.
2. Psychoanalysis. a person who suffers from narcissism, deriving erotic gratification from admiration of his or her own physical or mental
attributes.

To all the children with a Narcissistic Parent:

You are old enough where we can have this conversation. I am so tired of the way he breaks your heart time and time again. Your tears break my heart. Every empty promise that brings you pain gives me pain too.

Can I share something with you? It’s not you. It’s not about anything you did or didn’t do. Sweetie, your father is a Narcissist.

According to Mythology:

Source:Wikpedia
Source:Wikpedia

In Greek mythology, Narcissus (/nɑrˈsɪsəs/; Greek: Νάρκισσος, Narkissos) was a hunter from the territory of Thespiae in Boeotia who was renowned for his beauty. He was the son of a river god named Cephissus and a nymph named Liriope.

He was exceptionally proud, in that he disdained those who loved him. Nemesis noticed this behavior and attracted Narcissus to a pool, where he saw his own reflection in the water and fell in love with it, not realizing it was merely an image. Unable to leave the beauty of his reflection, Narcissus drowned. Narcissus is the origin of the term narcissism, a fixation with oneself.
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I am here to let you know that I love you. And I support you. I give you freedom to make your own choices and learn from your mistakes. I will be here to pick up the pieces when he degrades you and belittles you. I know what it feels like because he did it to me first.

 

I love you, and I will shelter you under the shadow of my wings just like God does for all of us. Put up the mirror around your heart and let his harsh words bounce off you as they are not true.  You are beautiful. You matter. You are smart. And I love you,

Mom

 

(Click on pictures to enlarge)

 

(All images from breakingupwithyournarcissist.com, Pinterest, brainwashingchildren.com, lattuera.com, Wikpedia, quotepixel.com, LaHuera.com)

Journal Entries from a Former Domestic Violence Victim

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.  I have not posted on this subject yet this month, but today I want to share a few entries from my journal.  Someone you know is most likely affected by Domestic Violence.  Last I heard DV affects 1/3 women and 1/6 men in the United States.  And I am sure these numbers go up in other places.

I have been in many abusive relationships. Not by choice. I didn’t want to live that way. But, thanks to God, I got the help I needed and my kids and I have been free from DV for about 10 years now.  Being as I have had more than one ‘psycho’ in my life, I will change the names and dates so they don’t start harassing me again.  This is one of the reasons I have not always shared. We do open ourselves up for more harassment if the Abuser finds out. But I want you to know the sheer terror and fear a victim lives with every day.  And it does get worse when we leave, trust me.

One of the things the Police, Lawyers, and Advocates taught me early on was to keep a journal of every abusive thing that happens.  We often have to prove in court that the pattern of Abuse has happened over a period of time.  I have also shared these with Guardian-at-litum – the attorny that was appointed for the kids when I was getting divorced.  It helped me receive FULL custody and FULL placement of my kids.  And it reminds me, of the truth.  Denial is powerful. And so is learned helplessness. Thank you Lord, for deliverance from violent and evil men!

For my protection I will name the Abuser “Joe”, but in my journal I used his real name. These are just a few entries…

 

Journal Entries from a Former Domestic Violence Victim

  • ” I can’t believe how nice Joe is being after this fight.  Take a step back Diana. Remember how nice Delilah was to Samson before she handed him over to be killed?  Don’t believe it. It is not true.  The spirit is not dumb.  Don’t go there, not now, it is not the right time.  The proof is in the pudding”

  • “Joe’s anger is not the issue.  He is angry and abusive to any woman.  It is the Spirit of Anger that drives him. And Joe likes it that way.  But God will be your shield and buckler.”

  • “I can’t believe Joe came to church after I left him. And then he sits down right next to me.  God speaks to my spirit, “Let My works speak for themselves.” The Lord will be my Protector and my Defense.  And then Joe tried to touch me. In the spirit I felt him put his hands around my neck as he had done so many times.  I got up and walked away. God is my Defender and Protector – not you Joe.”

  • “Last night was prayer group. I was praying for my kids. While praying  I spoke against the spirit in Joe. It looked like an Octopus with arms everywhere.  I spoke against in Jesus Name and it crawled into  a corner.”

  • “I can’t believe I slept with the Enemy. And then I married him.”

  • “Don’t respond when the Demons rise.  Joe came to pick up the kids for his visit at my work. Comes over and says, ‘I love you D.’ Those are just empty words again.  I don’t respond.  So then he took my daughter J and went and cut her hair – really, really short. Joe knew I would not have approved. He chose to use her as a weapon against me, and she is only 6. That is not love.”

  • “Well, Joe screamed at me in the parking lot at my work – again. My friend Patty came out and asked if there was anything wrong and if I was ok. Joe kept screaming at me.”

  • “Joe came to drop off kids on the side of the building. (It was a grocery store – we always met in public places for drop offs and pick ups for safety reasons. My youngest was only 4 and still in a carseat). Joe pulled next to me and tried to carry my youngest child into my van. I told Joe he was not going in my van.  I buckled my child in and Joe traps me and the kids in my van. He stands in the sliding door and refuses to move.  Joe says his name is still on the van and he wants it back.  I get a picture in my head of an angry dog – yelling and screaming and barking all while it devours its prey. I backed up out of the van, using my body to force him back and away from the kids. Protect the kids Diana. I shut the sliding van door and got in the drivers seart.  I tried to roll up the window but I wasn’t fast enough. Joe held it down.  I started the car and started backing up – terrified.  Joe finally backed off, got in his car and squeeled his tires as he sped away.”

  • “No more Lord – I release Joe to You.  I took off my wedding ring today and put it in the garage. Deliver us Lord.  Joe called me 3 times that night.  I didn’t answer.”

  • “It’s 40 days since I left. I went back to the park and cried a pillar of tears. I wrestled with God and ‘buried’ Joe and our marriage. The Army used to kill Deserters.  It’s over.”

 

Psalm 35:1-9 (AMP)


Contend, O Lord, with those who contend with me; fight against those who fight against me!

Take hold of shield and buckler, and stand up for my help!

Draw out also the spear and javelin and close up the way of those who pursue and persecute me. Say to me, I am your deliverance!

Let them be put to shame and dishonor who seek and require my life; let them be turned back and confounded who plan my hurt!

Let them be as chaff before the wind, with the Angel of the Lord driving them on!

Let their way be through dark and slippery places, with the Angel of the Lord pursuing and afflicting them.

For without cause they hid for me their net; a pit of destruction without cause they dug for my life.

Let destruction befall [my foe] unawares; let the net he hid for me catch him; let him fall into that very destruction.

Then I shall be joyful in the Lord; I shall rejoice in His deliverance.

 

 

You can learn more in my book SNOW WHITE DARKNESS 

available on Amazon, Kindle, and Google Play

Jezebels Are Androgynous Narcissists

Jezebels are Androgynous Narcissits – being both male or female – hermaphroditic.  This same spirit could live in a man just as much as it could live in a woman. It is not about being male or female.   So ignore the “he” or “she”  gender in the images below.

The Psychological Community calls them Narcissists.  

The Church Community calls them a Jezebel.

But I believe they are one and the same.  

Call them what you will.

It’s all about power and control.

 

According to Psychology Today here is the definition of a Narcissist:

 

Narcissistic Personality Disorder involves arrogant behavior, a lack of empathy for other people, and a need for admiration-all of which must be consistently evident at work and in relationships. People who are narcissistic are frequently described as cocky, self-centered, manipulative, and demanding. Narcissists may concentrate on unlikely personal outcomes (e.g., fame) and may be convinced that they deserve special treatment. Related Personality Disorders: Antisocial, Borderline, Histrionic. Narcissism is a less extreme version of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Narcissism involves cockiness, manipulativeness, selfishness, power motives, and vanity-a love of mirrors. Related personality traits include: Psychopathy, Machiavellianism.

 

 

And here is a Definition of the Jezebel Spirit from an Article by Discerning the Truth:

 

  • They gain power by diminishing others. It is causes them a rush “win” over someone. They manage to get in positions of authority, and are difficult to displace, once there.
  • They are controlling, manipulative, bossy.
  • They can either be war-like in their personalities, so that they are intimidating, or so sweet, timid, charming and charismatic, they are able to fool and recruit others to join them.
  • The spirit is critical of others, vicious to the point of blood thirsty as to reveal weaknesses.
  • They are never wrong in their own eyes; they are unable to apologize.
  • They recruit others to rally behind their charges against their victims. They act to persuade recruits, and do not give up this activity until the recruits are won over. If the potential recruits do not cooperate and accept their position they will grow angry.
  • They are by nature narcissistic. While they tend to be oversensitive, they have no concern for the feelings of others. They are not sympathetic about their victims, and tend to play the role of victim themselves, in order to gain sympathy. This way the real victim is left stranded, and opposed by others if they ask for help. Being the center of attention really pleases them.
  • They lie, and they believe their own lie. Avoiding the truth, or intentionally acting to withhold truth is part of a false picture presented to others.
  • Impulsive, disorganized, failure to plan ahead. Life is often chaotic and family in their care is in disarray.
  • The have a lack of remorse after hurting someone. They can justify the harm and remain smug about their victory.
  • They prove to be consistent irresponsibility, unpunctual, undependable. Will make rash promises, but cannot be trusted to fulfill.
  • They often express irritability, aggressiveness (open or subtle), and can be quick tempered.
  • This person is an “outlier” or non-conformist, they have their own ways.
  • Psychological counseling will not help, since they deny their condition.
  • They may claim religious sentiments, but are found very superficial in spiritual disciplines. Places emphasis on emotions over depth of condition.
  • These women tend to control their men with sex. And they pick passive men (Ahab’s) so they can dominate them.
  • They are usually married but often end up divorced. They may entertain affairs. If single, can be bisexual or promiscuous.

 

Jezebel Spirit

 

 

Kinda creepy huh? I found these images on Pinterest and I was struck with how it is the same. In my opinion – it’s all about power and control here.  Same as with Domestic Violence.  One person trying to use and abuse another.

Let us recognize the warning signs in all our relationships.

narcissist 3

 

We are not stupid.

We are not crazy.

That is just him/her trying to shift the blame and attention away from their bad behavior.

I had to ask myself, “Is this relationship healthy?”

I had to have someone I could trust to bounce my ideas off of. I saw a qualified Christian Counselor. It helped me make some life changing choices.  And today, I am grateful.

What about you? Do you need help?

Reach out today – you are not alone.

 

narcissist 5

 

 

 

Here is Your Sign – No Narcissists Allowed!

Here is your sign – No Narcissists Allowed!

What is a narcissist you ask? I wish I would have asked – years ago! Wow, that would have saved a lot of heartache.  I was married to one – well ok, two -before I found out what was really going on. I thought I was crazy. I thought I was losing my mind – seriously.  After all, they said I was crazy. They said I didn’t know anything. They said I couldn’t remember the truth…you know right?

Ok, so 2 divorces later here I am to share with you the “wisdom” I gleaned on the way. I’m sure you have some too – feel free to leave me a comment!

Guess what – we are not crazy!

They are! Hahahahahaha!

 

Seriously – NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) is a mental condition. And requires psychotherapy. All those years I spent in therapy thinking it was ALL my fault! Honestly, you have to laugh or cry!

According to the Mayo Clinic:

Narcissistic personality disorder symptoms may include:

  • Believing that you’re better than others
  • Fantasizing about power, success and attractiveness
  • Exaggerating your achievements or talents
  • Expecting constant praise and admiration
  • Believing that you’re special and acting accordingly
  • Failing to recognize other people’s emotions and feelings
  • Expecting others to go along with your ideas and plans
  • Taking advantage of others
  • Expressing disdain for those you feel are inferior
  • Being jealous of others
  • Believing that others are jealous of you
  • Trouble keeping healthy relationships
  • Setting unrealistic goals
  • Being easily hurt and rejected
  • Having a fragile self-esteem
  • Appearing as tough-minded or unemotional

 

 

More Signs of a Narcissit

1. It’s all about them. You don’t exist – except to listen to them brag about how important they are. They have very over-inflated egos. They are arrogant and prideful. Yes, they really do believe their s#*t does not stink!

2. Your feelings really don’t matter to them. You could talk until you are blue in the face and they still would not understand. And most of the time they really don’t care anyway.

3. They refuse to take responsibility for anything – ever. Even if they are caught red-handed. It is always somebody else’s fault for everything bad that happens to them.

4. They lie – a lot. They really have no sense of what is true and what is false. And their lies get bigger and more grandiose every time they tell the same story.

5.  They really do believe that they are superior and better than you. That’s why they take every opportunity to point out all of your flaws. They will cut you down and humiliate you in public just to make themselves feel better. Abusers are usually narcissistic.

6.  They really are two-faced.  In the beginning they are charming, and flattering. They entice you into their web of lies. And most people who don’t know them fall for it too. But behind closed doors the ‘snake’ comes out.

7.  They are vindictive.  They never forget who hurt them and will not miss an opportunity to retaliate. It might even be years later, yet they still hang onto anger and absolutely refuse to forgive anyone for anything. If you make them look bad ever, you will get clobbered.

8. They are masters at turning the tables. They will take something they are doing, and accuse you of the same thing. For ex. My ex was lying, so he accused me of lying. They will be having an affair, and then turn around and accuse you of having an affair. When they do something it is ok, but if you do it – you are wrong and stupid, and get humiliated.

And now, some perfect narcissist songs!

“I WANT TO TALK ABOUT ME!”

“ITS ALL ABOUT YOU”