22 Saturday Jul 2017
Posted in Jezebel, Religion and Spirituality, Spirituality
The jezebel spirit is a malicious spirit and usually teams up with the spirits of religion and witchcraft all 3 of which are controlling spirits Jezebel, in my dealings with this spirit, is the gate keeper. Along with her are: man hating spirit, jezebel hates men especially men of God who are prophets and […]
via The Jezebel Spirit — My Dreams and Visions
20 Tuesday Jun 2017
Posted in Jezebel, Narcissism, Rejection, Religion and Spirituality
Tags
Abuse, Book of Revelation, control, grace, Jesus, Jezebel, jezebel spirit, Narcissist, power and control, Rejection
The spirit of Jezebel loves to control others and take advantage of any situation. I have know many people in my life who have displayed this type of personality. You know the type: their way or the highway, always two faced, constantly a drama queen. They love to be the center of attention and will sacrifice others to get the admiration of who they desire. Sometimes people call them Narcissists.
Have you ever run into this kind of person?
Jezebels abuse grace. Give them an inch and they will take a mile. There is no grace with a Jezebel. There is no love, no loyalty, no honor. They will be nice to you in one moment and then turn around and gossip behind your back. You will feel the knife go in as they do it. Then they will walk over like nothing happened. No wonder God wants us to get rid of this spirit.
God gave her time to repent – she did NOT want to. Lets be real. Jezebels get what they want by manipulation and control. They do not want to change. It is working for them. The like feeling superior and better than – and they will ‘kill’ anyone who gets in their way. They lie, they cheat, they steal, they slander, they gossip, they set up master plans to destroy – whatever it takes to get their way.
In the Bible Jezebel even killed to get her way. She set up a scheme to get Naboth killed so she could have his vineyard. See 1 Kings 21 for the whole story. There is always a plan with this type of person. They thrive on manipulation.
My point here – there is no grace with Jezebel – unless it’s part of a bigger plan. Beware my friends. There is always more to the story when this spirit is involved.
source: watchmanreports.com
To the church in Thyatira
‘To the angel of the church in Thyatira write:
These are the words of the Son of God, whose eyes are like blazing fire and whose feet are like burnished bronze. I know your deeds, your love and faith, your service and perseverance, and that you are now doing more than you did at first.
Nevertheless, I have this against you: you tolerate that woman Jezebel, who calls herself a prophet. By her teaching she misleads my servants into sexual immorality and the eating of food sacrificed to idols. I have given her time to repent of her immorality, but she is unwilling. So I will cast her on a bed of suffering, and I will make those who commit adultery with her suffer intensely, unless they repent of her ways. 23 I will strike her children dead. Then all the churches will know that I am he who searches hearts and minds, and I will repay each of you according to your deeds. – Revelation 2: 18- 23 NKJV
19 Saturday Sep 2015
Posted in Boundaries, Jezebel, Narcissism, Spirituality
Tags
Abuse, depression, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence Awareness, Life, Narcissim, Narcissist, power and control, psychopaths, spirit of control, Unhealthy relationships
“They lie, cheat, steal, and kill to get their way. For them, it is a practical matter.” How I wish someone had taught me these things before I started dating for the first time. Life was always a game with men like this and they would do anything to win. Lesson learned.
Power elite psychopaths can be charming, charismatic, and intelligent. They are often seen as great leaders. They have powerful personalities with an almost a hypnotic ability to persuade and command people to do what they want. They can be smart, even scary smart—but in a devious, Machiavellian way. They are con artists who present a false image to the world, an image that they know will gain favorable attention.
Their emotional life consists of the gratification of acquiring, consuming, and possessing the best of everything, the thrill of conquest, the frustration of losing a fight, the triumph of defeating enemies, and the glory of egomania.
But above all, they live to conquer and to win. Psychopaths love battles—for them, it is a game. They go from one challenge to the next. They love winning and prizes, recognition and fame. They love privileges and exclusive clubs. They believe they are entitled…
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12 Friday Jun 2015
Posted in Boundaries, Depression, Domestic Violence and Abuse, Healing, Hope, Narcissism, Spirituality, Women
Tags
12 steps, Abuse, abuser, Boundaries, broken heart, deception, Domestic abuse, Domestic Violence, healing, Jezebel, jezebel spirit, keeping your sanity, let go, lies, Narcissist, power and control, Recovery, Relationships, sanity, steps, Unhealthy relationships
Keeping your sanity – when you are sleeping with the enemy. Let me share a story. I came to the Lord during a time of crisis in my life. Isn’t that how it goes? Anyway, I was charmed by the ‘snake’ just like Eve in the garden. His talk was smooth, he was absolutely charming, but underneath he was a snake. I lived many years in Domestic Abuse and little did I know that this was the start of a very destructive relationship. And, it has happened to me more than once – more than one relationship.
The World calls him the Abuser,
the Doctors call him the Narcissist,
and the Church calls him the Jezebel Spirit.
It’s all about deception, and ultimately power and control.
And you my friend are the target if you fall for his lies.
Recently I got an email from a follower asking for action steps on how to keep your sanity in the middle of the mess. Thank you my friend for the inspiration. Here is my experience.
I found a wonderful image of what this looks like from The Narcissists Wife.
(Other images from Pinterest)
04 Saturday Apr 2015
Tags
Abuse, Book, Campaign Against Domestic Violence, control, depression, Domestic abuse, Domestic Violence, fear, isaiah 58, Life, lovelessness, music, NaPoWriMo, poem, poetry, power and control, Unhealthy relationships, Video
This is a poem that I turned into a song that describes what it is like to live in Domestic Violence. 1 in 4 women and 1 in 6 men live like this everyday. And also a video that some of my friends did with CSpan about helping those living in abuse. Help us Lord to break the yoke of oppression in their lives and shine Your Light into their darkness, in Jesus Name.
© 2013 Diana Rasmussen
She looks in the mirror, seems vaguely familiar
like steam on the glass, shame covers her past
the fog slithers down, as evil surrounds
His worst fantasy, her reality
he pulls the strings, does unspeakable things
a sadistic entrance, for his acceptance
smothered by control, a tormented soul
trapped in his castle
her tears rolling mist, proof she exists
in snow white darkness
clouds of confusion, rolled into illusion
He veils perversion, forcing her coercion
her body he takes, while she flies away
unbelievable, she’s invisible
love is the shadow, that darkens her window
she’s crying for help, to escape her hell
smothered by control, a tormented soul
trapped in his castle
her tears rolling mist, proof she exists
in snow white darkness
she hides in the fog, drinks hair of the dog
hates her behavior, craves one to save her
smothered by control, a tormented soul
trapped in his castle
her tears rolling mist, proof she exists
in snow white darkness
“Is this not the fast that I have chosen:
To loose the bonds of wickedness,
To undo the heavy burdens,
To let the oppressed go free,
And that you break every yoke?
Is it not to share your bread with the hungry,
And that you bring to your house the poor who are cast out;
When you see the naked, that you cover him,
And not hide yourself from your own flesh?
Then your light shall break forth like the morning,
Your healing shall spring forth speedily,
And your righteousness shall go before you;
The glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard.
Then you shall call, and the Lord will answer;
You shall cry, and He will say, ‘Here I am.’ (Isaiah 58:6-9 NKJV)
This is also the title of my book – SNOW WHITE DARKNESS – Smothered by Control. It contains my journal entries from when I was living in abuse. Thank you Lord for deliverance for me and my children!
And here is the Album – available from GooglePlay. Thank you in advance for your love and support!
“And now for today’s prompt (optional, as always). Love poems are a staple of the poetry scene. It’s pretty hard to be a poet and not write a few – or a dozen – or maybe six books’ worth. But because so many love poems have been written, there are lots of clichés. Fill your poems with robins and hearts and flowers, and you’ll sound more like a greeting card than a bard. So today, I challenge you to write a “loveless” love poem. Don’t use the word love! And avoid the flowers and rainbows. And if you’re not in the mood for love? Well, the flip-side of the love poem – the break-up poem – is another staple of the poet’s repertoire. If that’s more your speed at present, try writing one of those, but again, avoid thunder, rain, and lines beginning with a plaintive “why”? Try to write a poem that expresses the feeling of love or lovelorn-ness without the traditional trappings you associate with the subject matter.”
01 Wednesday Apr 2015
Posted in Jezebel, Narcissism, Spirituality
Tags
1 Kings 18, Abuse, Books of Kings, christianity, Elijah the prophet, Fire falls, God, Holy Spirit, Jezebel, jezebel spirit, Mount Carmel, narcissism, power and control, Prophets of God, Religion and Spirituality, Spiritual warfare, Spirituality
Jezebel is a spirit. But where does it come from? That’s what I want to know. Why was she so hell bent on destruction? Why is she so against the Prophets of God? She must have got that way somehow. Yes, her Father led her the wrong way. She followed him into witchcraft and sorcery. It was her choice. And she led many astray.
But you know the interesting thing? There was a great man of God, Elijah, who displayed the powers and wonders of our God during her lifetime. God was there. And then it hit me:
Where there is a huge prophetic movement in a church or community – there will be a Jezebel spirit trying to pull it down. She will do whatever is necessary to divide the community, to push her fake ‘religious’ self and her agenda. And she hates the Spirit of the Living God. She will have those who follow and worship her.
But the good news – Elijah and God win! Elijah called down fire from Heaven and God answered his prayer. Even after the enemies of God poured water on the alter three times.
God is victorious! And the followers of Jezebel died that day. It’s quite an amazing story. You can read it all at 1 Kings 18. Here is a sample:
Now therefore, send and gather all Israel to me on Mount Carmel, the four hundred and fifty prophets of Baal, and the four hundred prophets of Asherah, who eat at Jezebel’s table.” (1 Kings 18:19 NKJV)
And it came to pass, at the time of the offering of the evening sacrifice, that Elijah the prophet came near and said, “Lord God of Abraham, Isaac, and Israel, let it be known this day that You are God in Israel and I am Your servant, and that I have done all these things at Your word. Hear me, O Lord, hear me, that this people may know that You are the Lord God, and that You have turned their hearts back to You again.”
Then the fire of the Lord fell and consumed the burnt sacrifice, and the wood and the stones and the dust, and it licked up the water that was in the trench. Now when all the people saw it, they fell on their faces; and they said, “TheLord, He is God! The Lord, He is God!”
And Elijah said to them, “Seize the prophets of Baal! Do not let one of them escape!” So they seized them; and Elijah brought them down to the Brook Kishon and executed them there. (1 Kings 18: 36-40 NKJV)
After Elijah called down the fire of God. God showed Himself strong. And Elijah killed all Jezebel’s followers in one day. After she heard the news Jezebel was determined to kill Elijah. Elijah had displayed how powerful God was, and how the 450 prophets of Baal and 400 prophets of Asherah had no power. They all died. Jezebel said she would kill Elijah. But again, God stepped in.
And Ahab told Jezebel all that Elijah had done, also how he had executed all the prophets with the sword. Then Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah, saying, “So let the gods do to me, and more also, if I do not make your life as the life of one of them by tomorrow about this time.” And when he saw that,he arose and ran for his life, and went to Beersheba, which belongs to Judah, and left his servant there. (1 Kings 19:1-3 NKJV)
Here is an interesting article I found on how Jezebel spirits are ‘born’. I have mixed feelings about it, let me know what you think. It is very hard for me to see Jezebel as a ‘victim’. Yet, there was a doorway open somewhere that let that spirit in.
What do you think?
“Babies are born to be normal, loving beings. This is to examine why anyone, like a Jezebel, would turn evil, or be open to an evil presence, that would dominate their thinking. Scripture says we war not against “flesh,” but against (evil) spirits, and principalities in high places. We have to remember that Jezebel is a spirit that infects people, who are victims as much as those people they damage by their behavior.”
Read the full article at:
(Photo Sources: burningfireshutinmybones.wordpress.com)
12 Thursday Mar 2015
Posted in Jezebel, Kingdom Authority, Spirituality
Tags
christianity, control, Derek Prince, God, Hope, Jesus, Jezebel, jezebel spirit, Life, power and control, Recovery, Religion and Spirituality, sermons, Spirituality, witchcraft
After doing research on the Jezebel Spirit and how she was a witch, I decided to dig further. I am not an expert in this area. I am a willing vessel of the Lord and share what He shows me. It may be that I am more sensitive to this spirit because I have lived with it. Both of my exs had this spirit. And I have a sister who practices witchcraft and sorcery. I have seen this spirit and know it intimately. I have seen it operate in my home, in the workplace, and in churches. It can operate in a man or a woman. I have seen both. And I have shivers today.
Now it happened, when Joram saw Jehu, that he said, “Is it peace, Jehu?”
So he answered, “What peace, as long as the harlotries of your mother Jezebel and her witchcraft are so many?” (2 Kings 9:22 NKJV)
Here are my sermon noted from Derek Prince’s YouTube video on Witchcraft – Part 1
Anytime that you get domination by one person over another the force behind this is evil and very often it is actually witchcraft. Sorcery can work through objects, music, etc. But witchcraft is a dominating satanic force, it is the force that dominates, captivates, and controls. And it works by spells, by curses, and personal domination.
It is NEVER the will of God for one person to DOMINATE another. Anytime you get domination of one person over another the force behind it is evil. That is witchcraft. Wives should not dominate husbands; Husbands should not dominate their wives; Parents should not dominate their children. Pastors should not dominate congregations. The Spiritual is one thing, but the soulish man is another.
Heavenly Versus Demonic Wisdom
Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show by good conduct that his works are done in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth. This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy. Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace. (James 3:13-18)
When anybody tries to get somebody to do what they want them to, they are in the ‘soulish’ and it often enters into the demonic. There is a down-gredation. (Earthy, soulish, demonic). Much prayer is soulish. Prayer is not a way to get God to do what we want Him to do. Prayer is not a way to get other people to do what we want them to do. Soulish prayers do not bring the Spirit of God into it but they bring dark, evil, and oppressive power (earthly ,soulish, demonic).
When a person, in the name of being ‘spiritual’, becomes soulish in order to assert to exert his own will over another, express his own personality, get his own desires and ambitions fulfilled, get other people doing what they want, (and it’s usually a woman) that person is in danger of coming under the influence of witchcraft.
1. Those that know they are witches. They practice with curses and spells. They intend to be witches. They cultivate it. They deal in Satan’s power.
2. Those that do not know that they are witches, and other people do not know they are witches. She is more dangerous. She is usually a good church member. But she is bent on controlling others. (we call them Jezebels)
EFFECTS OF WITCHCRAFT
But there is hope. There is peace. There is deliverance available. Have your Pastor pray with you and be delivered today from this spirit. Ladies, let your husbands be all who God made them to be. We are not their Holy Spirit. Let go of trying to control your men. God can heal them just like he heals us.
For those seeking deliverance – a word of caution – get a bucket. Often times when you are delivered from this spirit it may come out as a ‘black slime’ as it did in me. Yes, I have been delivered from witchcraft. I know. Repent today, and know peace again. There is hope my friends. Jesus still heals and delivers. And GOD is on the throne, not Jezebel!
(Featured Image Source – http://churchofjezebel.com)
30 Friday Jan 2015
Posted in Boundaries, Jezebel, Narcissism, Religion and Spirituality, Spirituality
Tags
christianity, Deliverance, depression, freedom, God, Jesus, Jezebel, jezebel spirit, power and control, Relationships, Religion and Spirituality, soul ties, Spiritual warfare, Spirituality, Unhealthy relationships, witchcraft, women of Bible
Jezebel is a witch. Yes, her father was Ethball, king of the Zidonians, and was both the king and priest of Baal worshipers. Their gods were Baal and Ashtaroth or Astarte. Ahab installed a temple to the Sun-god in Samaria with 450 priests. Jezebel had another sanctuary erected where she fed 400 of them at her table. Cruel and licentious rites were associated with Baal worship. According to BibleHistory.com
Baal (ba’al) was an ancient Canaanite and Mesopotamian deity associated with agriculture. He was believed to be the “giver of life” and mankind was dependant upon him for providing what was necessary to sustain the farms, flocks and herds. He was also called the “son of Dagon” (who was in control of the grain), and “Hadad” the storm god who would provide plentiful rains after hearing his voice (thunder).
And the most amazing thing I found in my research today. Ahab was a Jew and King of Northern Israel at the time. Yet he denounced his Hebrew faith and “took her to wife, and went and served Baal and worshiped him.” (1Kings 16:31) There is a great history lesson on Jezebel here:
All the Women of the Bible – Jezebel No. 1
Ahab turned his back on God for his relationship with Jezebel. He left his faith, and followed her wicked ways. He was ‘bewitched’ and taken hostage by Jezebel. And he ended up doing things he had not done before – all to keep her approval. Yet, she used him. And all like him.
Jezebel is out for blood. You cannot negotiate with her. She is not interested. She wants to murder you and your children. Seriously. She is out to destroy true worship of Jesus. She is against the Word. She is a witch and will charm her way in to many people’s lives and churches and businesses. Don’t trust her. She is not who she says she is. She is a witch.
God gave Jezebel time to repent. And God gives those with this spirit time to repent. God gave Ahab time to repent too. It could be weeks, months, or years. We don’t know.
I gave her time to repent, but she has no desire to repent of her immorality [symbolic of idolatry] and refuses to do so.
Take note: I will throw her on a bed [of anguish], and those who commit adultery with her [her paramours] I will bring down to pressing distress and severe affliction, unless they turn away their minds from conduct [such as] hers and repent of their doings. (Rev 2:21-22 AMP)
If you have helped a Jezebel, or submitted to one in your past, I urge you to break the soul-ties with this person and repent. Jezebel uses her bewitching powers of seduction to lure her victims in and create soul ties. She pretends to be your friend. She lures you in. Then she uses witchcraft, divination, and the spirit of seduction to tempt and entice you into doing something they would normally not do. She sends spirits to torment your mind, emotions, and imagination. She wants to control you. I found myself falling into all sorts of old destructive behaviors when influenced by this spirit. And I didn’t know why. Even after the relationship/friendship ended there was a ‘residue’. I awoke the other morning with a vision of a snake coiled around me trying to squeeze me to death. It was a ‘leftover’ from the Jezebel. I rebuked it in the name of Jesus and commanded it to leave me, my family, my finances, my health, my home, and my church. Soul ties are created in many ways. It’s not just sex that opens the door to a soul tie. According to Jonas Clark:
Once these soul ties are established, she has won. Jezebels are Narcissistic. They have no concern for you or your feelings. They are out to conquer and win. They lie and they believe their own lies. The justify everything they do. They are never wrong. And they are incapable of forgiveness.
End the relationship. Change your phone number. Do not allow the Jezebel into your life anymore. It is not just her, it is all the demons she caters to that you are letting in as well – into your home, into your peace, into your head. End it.
Tune in later and we will talk about how to break soul-ties.
Related articles
27 Saturday Dec 2014
Posted in Boundaries, Bullying, Domestic Violence and Abuse, Jezebel, Narcissism, Rejection, Spirituality
Tags
Abuse, Boundaries, Broken, broken heart, children, control, depression, Domestic Violence, Jezebel, Life, narcissism, Narcissist, parents, power and control, Self esteem, Unhealthy relationships
This blog is a letter to my children. I have been married to 2 Narcissists in my life. The Church calls them Jezebel Spirits. Here is my life lesson. In my opinion a Narcissist does not know what love is. It is always all about them. We are not people – we are possessions. And in his eyes, we are here to bow down and worship him. (sorry to be so blunt, but it’s true.)
You are old enough where we can have this conversation. I am so tired of the way he breaks your heart time and time again. Your tears break my heart. Every empty promise that brings you pain gives me pain too.
Can I share something with you? It’s not you. It’s not about anything you did or didn’t do. Sweetie, your father is a Narcissist.
According to Mythology:
Source:Wikpedia
In Greek mythology, Narcissus (/nɑrˈsɪsəs/; Greek: Νάρκισσος, Narkissos) was a hunter from the territory of Thespiae in Boeotia who was renowned for his beauty. He was the son of a river god named Cephissus and a nymph named Liriope.
I am here to let you know that I love you. And I support you. I give you freedom to make your own choices and learn from your mistakes. I will be here to pick up the pieces when he degrades you and belittles you. I know what it feels like because he did it to me first.
I love you, and I will shelter you under the shadow of my wings just like God does for all of us. Put up the mirror around your heart and let his harsh words bounce off you as they are not true. You are beautiful. You matter. You are smart. And I love you,
Mom
(Click on pictures to enlarge)
(All images from breakingupwithyournarcissist.com, Pinterest, brainwashingchildren.com, lattuera.com, Wikpedia, quotepixel.com, LaHuera.com)
24 Friday Oct 2014
Posted in Depression, Domestic Violence and Abuse, Rejection, Spirituality
Tags
Abuse, abusive, abusive relationship, Awareness, Deliverance, depression, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence Awareness, God, Narcissist, power and control, Recovery, Relationships, Religion and Spirituality, Social change, Spirituality
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. I have not posted on this subject yet this month, but today I want to share a few entries from my journal. Someone you know is most likely affected by Domestic Violence. Last I heard DV affects 1/3 women and 1/6 men in the United States. And I am sure these numbers go up in other places.
I have been in many abusive relationships. Not by choice. I didn’t want to live that way. But, thanks to God, I got the help I needed and my kids and I have been free from DV for about 10 years now. Being as I have had more than one ‘psycho’ in my life, I will change the names and dates so they don’t start harassing me again. This is one of the reasons I have not always shared. We do open ourselves up for more harassment if the Abuser finds out. But I want you to know the sheer terror and fear a victim lives with every day. And it does get worse when we leave, trust me.
One of the things the Police, Lawyers, and Advocates taught me early on was to keep a journal of every abusive thing that happens. We often have to prove in court that the pattern of Abuse has happened over a period of time. I have also shared these with Guardian-at-litum – the attorny that was appointed for the kids when I was getting divorced. It helped me receive FULL custody and FULL placement of my kids. And it reminds me, of the truth. Denial is powerful. And so is learned helplessness. Thank you Lord, for deliverance from violent and evil men!
For my protection I will name the Abuser “Joe”, but in my journal I used his real name. These are just a few entries…
Psalm 35:1-9 (AMP)
Contend, O Lord, with those who contend with me; fight against those who fight against me!
Take hold of shield and buckler, and stand up for my help!
Draw out also the spear and javelin and close up the way of those who pursue and persecute me. Say to me, I am your deliverance!
Let them be put to shame and dishonor who seek and require my life; let them be turned back and confounded who plan my hurt!
Let them be as chaff before the wind, with the Angel of the Lord driving them on!
Let their way be through dark and slippery places, with the Angel of the Lord pursuing and afflicting them.
For without cause they hid for me their net; a pit of destruction without cause they dug for my life.
Let destruction befall [my foe] unawares; let the net he hid for me catch him; let him fall into that very destruction.
Then I shall be joyful in the Lord; I shall rejoice in His deliverance.
You can learn more in my book SNOW WHITE DARKNESS
available on Amazon, Kindle, and Google Play
28 Thursday Aug 2014
Posted in Activism, Boundaries, Depression, Domestic Violence and Abuse, Jezebel, Narcissism, Spirituality
Tags
Abuse, Broken, broken heart, Domestic abuse, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence Awareness, Jezebel, jezebel spirit, Narcissist, power and control, Relationships, Self esteem, Unhealthy relationships
Jezebels are Androgynous Narcissits – being both male or female – hermaphroditic. This same spirit could live in a man just as much as it could live in a woman. It is not about being male or female. So ignore the “he” or “she” gender in the images below.
The Psychological Community calls them Narcissists.
The Church Community calls them a Jezebel.
But I believe they are one and the same.
Call them what you will.
It’s all about power and control.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder involves arrogant behavior, a lack of empathy for other people, and a need for admiration-all of which must be consistently evident at work and in relationships. People who are narcissistic are frequently described as cocky, self-centered, manipulative, and demanding. Narcissists may concentrate on unlikely personal outcomes (e.g., fame) and may be convinced that they deserve special treatment. Related Personality Disorders: Antisocial, Borderline, Histrionic. Narcissism is a less extreme version of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Narcissism involves cockiness, manipulativeness, selfishness, power motives, and vanity-a love of mirrors. Related personality traits include: Psychopathy, Machiavellianism.
- They gain power by diminishing others. It is causes them a rush “win” over someone. They manage to get in positions of authority, and are difficult to displace, once there.
- They are controlling, manipulative, bossy.
- They can either be war-like in their personalities, so that they are intimidating, or so sweet, timid, charming and charismatic, they are able to fool and recruit others to join them.
- The spirit is critical of others, vicious to the point of blood thirsty as to reveal weaknesses.
- They are never wrong in their own eyes; they are unable to apologize.
- They recruit others to rally behind their charges against their victims. They act to persuade recruits, and do not give up this activity until the recruits are won over. If the potential recruits do not cooperate and accept their position they will grow angry.
- They are by nature narcissistic. While they tend to be oversensitive, they have no concern for the feelings of others. They are not sympathetic about their victims, and tend to play the role of victim themselves, in order to gain sympathy. This way the real victim is left stranded, and opposed by others if they ask for help. Being the center of attention really pleases them.
- They lie, and they believe their own lie. Avoiding the truth, or intentionally acting to withhold truth is part of a false picture presented to others.
- Impulsive, disorganized, failure to plan ahead. Life is often chaotic and family in their care is in disarray.
- The have a lack of remorse after hurting someone. They can justify the harm and remain smug about their victory.
- They prove to be consistent irresponsibility, unpunctual, undependable. Will make rash promises, but cannot be trusted to fulfill.
- They often express irritability, aggressiveness (open or subtle), and can be quick tempered.
- This person is an “outlier” or non-conformist, they have their own ways.
- Psychological counseling will not help, since they deny their condition.
- They may claim religious sentiments, but are found very superficial in spiritual disciplines. Places emphasis on emotions over depth of condition.
- These women tend to control their men with sex. And they pick passive men (Ahab’s) so they can dominate them.
- They are usually married but often end up divorced. They may entertain affairs. If single, can be bisexual or promiscuous.
Kinda creepy huh? I found these images on Pinterest and I was struck with how it is the same. In my opinion – it’s all about power and control here. Same as with Domestic Violence. One person trying to use and abuse another.
Let us recognize the warning signs in all our relationships.
We are not stupid.
We are not crazy.
That is just him/her trying to shift the blame and attention away from their bad behavior.
I had to ask myself, “Is this relationship healthy?”
I had to have someone I could trust to bounce my ideas off of. I saw a qualified Christian Counselor. It helped me make some life changing choices. And today, I am grateful.
What about you? Do you need help?
Reach out today – you are not alone.
18 Monday Aug 2014
Posted in Activism, Depression, Domestic Violence and Abuse, Rejection
Tags
Abuse, abuser, Domestic abuse, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence Awareness, how to spot abuser, lies, power and control, survivor, unhealthy reltaionships
I told myself this would never happen again. After getting out of the last abusive relationship, I vowed to myself that I would never let someone treat me like that ever again. And yet, not knowing how sick I was – the next relationship was more abusive than the last. The stakes were higher, the abuse was deeper, and let’s just say there are a lot of sick folk out there. I want to share this part of my story today. I see other women going from man to man, from abuse to abuse, looking for the next Prince Charming. And it hurts. It hurts to see it. Because you know the price you paid to get out. And you don’t want to see another woman/girl hurt.
I wasn’t born stupid. Really. Intelligence has nothing to do with it. I was deceived. I believed all the pretty little lies he said. I wanted a picture perfect marriage. I wanted the white picket fence. Who doesn’t? I mean it’s not like you know the end from the beginning. Hey if I knew then what I know now, my answer would have been, “NO way, not in a million years!”
After relationship upon relationship with Abusers I was forced to look in the mirror. No I did not ask for it. No I did not want it, but lets face it – my ‘people’ radar was broken. I was trusting people that were not safe. I was putting myself in a position to be hurt – again and again. And I had to make a new choice. A choice to learn what a healthy relationship looked like, and admit that I wasn’t in one. That hurt too. What I thought I had was a lie. The truth has a way of shining into the darkness and peeling away the lies I kept telling myself. Yeah, all the pretty little lies we tell ourselves – because we are afraid. And fearful. And have no friends, and no money by this point.
If you find yourself in an abusive relationship, get help today. It really does not need to stay that way. As for me, I couldn’t do it alone. I didn’t know how. My first stop was the local YWCA and the Domestic Violence Center Advocate. She listened as I shared my story. No judgement, no pointing fingers – she listened. And then I met a whole building full of other women who had been through the same thing. Girl power. I was not alone. And me and the kids could be free. That was like a breath of fresh air right there!
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