Tag: work

Domestic Violence and the Workplace

She may be sitting next to you, or in the cubicle down the hall. The quiet girl who came in late today. Tear stains ran down her creek, and she was wearing sun glasses.  Last time that happened it was because she had a black eye.  Do you approach her? What do you say? Do you just look away and mind your own business? With current statistics 1/4 women and 1/6 men are living in domestic violence. And they are trying to hold down a job to the best of their ability. It is a situation that we must approach. We can no longer afford to just ignore her. It is time for our Employers to offer assistance when someone is being stalked. It IS happening at work too!

I know for me, that was one of my ex’s favorite things to do – call me 20 times in an hour to harass me. Or suddenly stop in and make a big scene in front of my coworkers. It was so embarrassing.  I have even quit jobs just to get away from him.  My boss knew what was happening – yet did nothing.

As employers we have EAP programs (Employee Assistance Programs)  to help with drug addictions, alcohol addictions, counseling, health issues, aging parents, maternity leaves, medical leaves, etc. but my question is – where is everyone when a woman is getting stalked at work? Nobody wants to talk to her or help her escape. Nobody wants to help her form an escape plan and look for housing for her and her children.  For me, I just got reprimanded for being late, missing work, etc. Perhaps your experience was different.

Today I challenge all the companies and corporations out there. Stop ignoring the abused worker in your workplace. Let’s stop the silence. The stress they are living under is unbearable. It is affecting them and their work. They need this job, and they need some support. Help them escape instead.

Here are some alarming statistics from Employers Against Domestic Violence:

Domestic violence affects productivity and increases absenteeism:

24% of women between the ages of 18 and 65 have experienced domestic violence (EDK Associates, The Many Faces of Domestic Violence and its Impact on the Workplace, 1997).

74% of employed battered women were harassed by their partner while at work. This caused 56% of them to be late for work at least five times a month, 28% to leave early at least five days a month, and 54% to miss at least three full days of work a month.

The total health care costs of family violence are estimated in the hundreds of millions each year, much of which is paid for by the employer. 44% of executives surveyed say that that domestic violence increases their health care costs (Pennsylvania Blue Shield Institute, Social Problems and Rising Health Care Costs in Pennsylvania, pp. 3-5, 1992).

47% of senior executives polled said that domestic violence has a harmful effect on the company’s productivity (Roper Starch Worldwide Study for Liz Claiborne, Inc., 1994).

71% of EAP providers surveyed have dealt with an employee being stalked at work by a current of former partner, and 83% have assisted an employee with a restraining order.

78% of Human Resources professionals polled by Personnel Journal said that domestic violence is a workplace issue (April, 1995, page 65).

94% of Corporate Security Directors surveyed rank domestic violence as a high security problem at their company. National Safe Workplace Institute survey, as cited in “Talking Frankly About Domestic Violence,” Personnel Journal, April, 1995, page 64).


(All images from Pinterest)

A Screwdriver and a Pen

God will give you what you need, when you need it.  I have a funny story to share with you.  My husband Bob and I have our own IT Business, InnovativeTeks.  For the last two years, since my leg broke, he has been the one driving all around doing all these jobs for different businesses while I have been in PT and recovery mode.  What a man of God.  He trusts God to provide work each and every day and is flexible enough to not lose it when things change.

So, yesterday was Monday – yeah a real Monday.  He had 3 jobs over towards Milwaukee – which is over an hour from our little country home.  We have a Toyota Camry for our work car, and he has a fold up ladder and his tools in the trunk – usually.  But remember, this was Monday.  The day before, because we play together at church, he had taken out his tools and the ladder and put them in our shed to fit the guitar and music bag, and of course the kids.  (No we didn’t put them in the trunk!)

Anyway, he gets to Milwaukee and sends me this picture:  His text says, “Oh boy, weeeee…”.  This is a $15,000 Server that has been down with 16 Hard Drives inside.  My response, “May God give you favor!”.  Then he goes to the trunk –  no tools. Great. God speaks to his heart, “Everything you need is already here.” 


So Bob digs in the trunk and finds a screwdriver and a pen.  And goes into this big business, who shall remain unnamed, with a screwdriver and a pen.  After talking to the Manager he finds out the device has been down for over a month.  It was new and it has never worked.  They have had multiple people there who make well over $100,000/year trying to fix it.  So Bob prays, “Lord, show me.”  The system did not see all the hard drives – even though they were already there.

Long story short, God gave him wisdom.  It was a script error.  There was nothing wrong with the motherboard or the computer. It had everything it needed, but the script did not “see” all the hard drives.  Bob did what he does with God’s wisdom, and changed the script.  And he fixed it – with a screwdriver and a pen!

It makes me wonder – We already have the Holy Spirit – the power of God inside of us.  

How many of us have hidden hard drives?

The script for our lives has been rewritten with the Blood of Jesus.  

Everything we already need is in us.  

Let’s stop running the old script – we are restored – by the Blood of Jesus – all it took was a screwdriver and a pen!


Do you work or play?

I had the pleasure of a ‘coffee date’ with my teenage daughter last night.  Twice a month we go listen to live music at our local coffee shop.  It was fun, and I am amazed at the Local Talent here in southern WI.  Anyway, this coffee shop puts up a quote a day. Here is the one they had posted last night, from Author James Michener.

from: http://www.rugusavay.com/james-a-michener-quotes/

So that started the wheels spinning, lol!  I spent the evening listening to music and reflecting. OK, where have I refused to see the light?  What am I still holding onto to stay in the dark?

My latest ‘battle’ is work-related. Or should I say, what to do about work after this leg thing.  I have had many ‘jobs’ in my lifetime.  Us moms usually do.  I did get a college degree in Biology/Chemistry but really only worked in the field for a few years.  After I had kids my priorities changed.  Life changed. Things happened.  I don’t regret it, my kids are way more important than any  job.  I am grateful for the time I have had to spend with them.

After divorce, I had to go back to work, kids or no kids.  Yep I did the 9-5, and then 6-3, and another part-time job 4-9pm all to try to survive after the financial mess a divorce (or two) leaves you with. And the daycare fun, yeah right.  But we made it.  May not have been pretty, or looked like much, but to us – we survived.  That in itself was a miracle.

And now, I am looking forward.  What do you want to do with the next 20 years Ms D? Go back to a ‘regular’ job. Idk. I have put out a few resumes for ‘desk’ jobs. But seriously, I am competing with the 20 year olds. Wow, I remember when I was that young.  Such high hopes and felt on top of the world.

Today I just want to ‘play’. I don’t want to ‘work’. Does that sound stupid? I am not a lazy person, I have had 2-3 jobs sometimes. I have done the ‘work’ thing. But can’t I just play and make money doing that?The ‘work’ thing was not fun or fulfilling.  It was rather empty.

So, what does ‘play’ mean to you? For me it is writing and music.  So I started looking there. Recently I have been writing music, and working for some online companies doing writing/voice overs and the like. It is much calmer lifestyle for me. And it allows me to run kids around for different activities.

My husband runs his own computer business – he thinks that is fun. Crazy, I know, but he loves it, and he is very good at it. Bob drives all over doing IT work for lots of big name companies. “Never the same day twice” he says.  He is amazing, and a gift from God.  So, He inspires me too – to do what God made me for – and to trust that God will work it out.  I am blessed.

So do you ‘work’ or do you ‘play’?

Source: http://raevisita.tumblr.com/post/12932982679/art-of-living


“A person can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in their own toil. This too, I see, is from the hand of God,  for without him, who can eat or find enjoyment?  To the person who pleases him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness, but to the sinner he gives the task of gathering and storing up wealth to hand it over to the one who pleases God. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.” (Ecclesiastes 2:24-26 NIV)

“What do workers gain from their toil?  I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race. He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end. I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live.  That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God.  I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that people will fear him…

 So I saw that there is nothing better for a person than to enjoy their work, because that is their lot. For who can bring them to see what will happen after them? (Ecclesiastes 3:9-14, 22 NIV)


Dear Lord,

We know you made us to give you glory here on Earth.  To shine light in the darkness and spread joy and peace.  Lead us to the field you want us to plant in.  We are tired of ‘working’ and not getting anywhere. Like Solomon, toil seems useless sometimes. Let us rest in your peace, and ‘play’.  Enjoy our time here with you, and show others how awesome You are. You have put this special plan of eternity in our hearts, so let us remember that our assignment here is only temporary, in Jesus Name.