I’m Afraid for You


©2013 Diana Rasmussen

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She lived in the trailer right across the street
not much of a neighbor she kept to herself
When the sun went down the fights would start
noises travel in a trailer park
I went over one day with cookies in hand
saw the fear in her eyes said

I’m afraid for you
I heard what he called you last night
what he’s doing just isn’t right
My door’s always open
anytime day or night
I’m afraid for you

That night he came home
smelled something amiss
he started screaming and yelling
I heard punching fists

Afraid for my friend
I called 911
it was time for
this to be done

I’m afraid for you
I heard what he called you last night
what he’s doing just isn’t right
My door’s always open
anytime day or night
I’m afraid for you

She stood in the driveway
blood on her white gown
cops took him away
when I said

I’m afraid for you
I heard what he called you last night
what he’s doing just isn’t right
My door’s always open
anytime day or night
I’m afraid for you

Picture from: saludify.com
Picture from: saludify.com


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  2. Reblogged this on Just Show Up and commented:
    I am reposting this blog because it hit me, especially when I spent a few hours with a group of survivors yesterday. It is a wonder to witness the mixture of raw pain and emotion along with the stamina and grace to overcome. The greatest dynamic of my experience yesterday was being with a 17 yr old survivor along with the group of 40+ yr old survivors and acknowledging the hope the 40+ survivors had for the 17 year old because she is getting help NOW. She is talking about it NOW. She is fighting for herself NOW. The more she talks, the more she heals and the stronger she becomes. She will know her worth, fight for her dignity and respect and bypass the years of bad decisions the rest of us lived through.
    I think Diana’s post is beautiful and one we should all reblog and pass on because you never know the ONE you’ll be reaching and saving.

  3. I hope you don’t mind I shared this awesome post on my Facebook page and put the link in a comment above! Thank you for sharing this so wonderfully done! 🙂

    • Thank you Shannon, feel free to share my post on your site. I will gather some info and send you a short bio. Thank you for the opportunity and blessings to you too. Diana

  4. My mom made a phone call once. We lived in an apt and the guy who lived above us had the cutest little girl and beautiful wife. All I remember was police and screaming and he was taken away. The wide and title – i never saw them again. I was proud of my. She was strong for others. Not for herself.

    • Yes, she helped save a life that day. I wish someone would have called from my neighborhood. This poem/song is actually about me. I was the girl in the trailer park, noise does travel. The neighbors knew but never called the cops. I guess this poem/song is how I wished my story would have ended.

      It’s often easier to see abuse in someone else. Then you are free to act and intervene. When you are living in it, there is a cost to act sometimes. I knew what was going on was wrong, but by that time I was so brainwashed that I didn’t believe in myself enough to act. I was afraid, I had no money, no job, no friends, no support. It took me many times before I left for good. I was sick too. I think I heard the average was 9 times that we go back before finally leaving.

      Thank you for sharing your testimony. I am glad that your mom called for help that day. I pray that we would all be as brave as she was that day. Blessings, Diana

      • Thank you. My mom never left. I did. But she wouldn’t. Thank you for your sweet words. Blessings back at ya – Kimberly.

  5. WOW… Absolutely beautiful and perfect message for victims.. I hope you don’t mind that i re blog it.. Love it…

  6. Diana, thank you for posting this. I was not able to plan before I left. My abuser was so controlling and oppressive with everything, I had to leave one morning when I went to work with what I was wearing and my purse. I didn’t know where I was going, but I knew I couldn’t ever go back. I had no money, because he took it all. I had no credit, because he also ruined that, so I couldn’t even get credit extended to me. I did not feel safe going to the police, because my abuser did sales for the department the next town over and also worked doing weapons sales for another organization. Some promotions and a lot of good press was given to them, so every time he got in trouble, they reach their fingers across county lines and vouch for him… and get him out of trouble. I have no reason to believe they would not have done the same in my case, and I am sure they had something to do with him getting out a few months ago after having been arrested in May on child support and things they found on him when processing that were not his.

    Eight months since I left, I am still in my not-so temporary, apparently, living situation. I still do not have a car (he got pulled over in December the week before I left, the car was impounded because he was driving without a license, uninsured in a car with a restricted registration and a bad muffler… all because the clutch was bad, and he ran a stop sign), because I had mine destroyed. He kept harassing the garage who had the car impounded so I put a stop to that. I hated that car anyway! I have, however, gotten my own cell phone (for the first time in four years), a closet full of clothes and shoes, makeup (all that was NOT allowed), a few books, my hair done (also for the first time in four years), jewelry, paid off the back taxes I owed because of him, got my student loans out of default, thanks to the loan companies being so kind, have a credit card with a small credit limit, and have paid off some smaller debts. I still have a mountain of debt from him. My once kind of shiny score was devastated in January. Since February, I have purchased a legal services plan an ID theft monitoring plan, and my score has gone back up over 50 points.

    Even with everything I have lost, I am still far better without him than I ever was constantly within his reach. And you can believe that, especially after hearing the news about Jared Remy murdering Jennifer Martell the day after the order was allowed to expire (thanks to his family convincing her to allow it), I will be at court seeking an extension for mine.

    • I have been there with you. I get it. I was grateful that I left too, with the clothes off my back. It has been 8-10 years ago for me and I can tell you it is still worth it! I lived in fear for so long. And why is it the controllers/abusers always work with guns? Wow, I wish I would have known about that fascination – guess it’s the whole power and control thing all over again. I had my credit trashed too, after letting him use my name for vehicles, credit cards, etc. But even that is better than to have stayed in an abusive relationship. Things were never getting better – only worse as time went on. I am so proud of you! wow – the things we go through to be free, some people have no idea! Good for you Sweet Marie, I would definitely do whatever you need to do to stay safe. May God restore everything that you have lost 100 times over, in Jesus Name…

  7. This is such a wonderful blog. I escaped my abuser after seventeen years of abuse with the help of a shelter, police, hospital and my 13 yr old daughter at the time, unfortunately my daughter went on to be with an abuser that ended up killing her two and a half years ago she thought she could change him and was afraid to tell family. Thank you so much for this informative blog If it helps one person it will be worth all your wonderful effort.

    • Thank you for your kind words. I cannot even imagine what you have been through. Thank you so much for sharing your life and pain with us. I am so sorry for your loss. My heart weeps for you…

      • Life goes on, it has in some ways made me stronger some ways weaker but always compassionate towards those in that situation. Thank you for your comments.

  8. Good job getting the word out, Dianna. God never intended for any of us to be a punching bag. Some of our brightest and finest have fallen for this, thinking, “I can change him.” Only God can change him. And make no mistake, God wants you to be safe! Sanctuary is needed for everyone of these people in jeopardy.

  9. Easy on paper. My mother escaped a violence man. He found her 6 states away. Woman need safe houses and protection. I like the good advice in the blog. We must ensure woman have safe places to go. Always.

    • I agree with you. The most dangerous time is right after we leave. That was why it is so important to get support from local DV shelters and the police. How is your mom now? I did the restraining order and of course my abuser broke it. I called the police again and he got another ticket. It was only through the support I got from qualified professionals that I was able to stand in the truth and leave. Denial is so powerful when you are living in abuse. Thank you for your input, I appreciate your wisdom.

      • Took many years. He finally left her alone. She had to leave the state. I was a kid only then. I went to 12 schools at least. Poor mother had to run often. She is fine today. Met a good man and been together since 1980. We must ensure the Government don’t cut the needed organizations.

        • Wow, I can’t imagine moving that often. But then I thought back, and I moved like16 times in 8 years I was with this last guy. Crazy, it was such a blur.
          I am grateful she and you are safe. What would you tell an abused woman? Your perspective is one that we all need to know. I have to say, when I was in the thick of it, I should have listened to my kids sooner. Children have a way of cutting through the lies at an early age.

        • Kids are hard. I enjoyed the traveling. Made me a Gypsy in life. I would tell any woman what I told my three daughters. Know the person. If he is jealous type. He will get worst. If he is mean. He will get meaner. People don’t change. Woman and men think they can save or change someone. No-one can change unless something terrible happen to them. If it is too late. Abuse is alive. Need to run and don’t be found. This is why woman need places to begin a new life. Safe and secure.

    • Agreed! The gift of sanctuary in a neutral, non-threatening site is needed now, more than ever!

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