You’re locked in a room with your greatest fear. Describe what’s in the room.

I close my eyes, and remember a time, when I was frightened…

I don’t know if I am going to live or die today.  It is so dark but the air is so heavy.  Wait…I can feel that black spirit flying around my head again.  I hate this room.   Stop it!  I can’t believe I am back here again.  I told myself I was never going to come here again.   I am locked in a room with my PAIN.

There are so many places in my life where it snuck in, kinda oozed it under the door, and through the vents, and it’s inside the walls….I have stuffed it into this room for so long now.  It’s the “secret room”.  The place where I bury my PAIN…

There are too many hurts, too many betrayals, too many “incidents”.  Is what is left over, when you have survived abuse.

Here’s one of the poems I wrote when I was in that dark  place:


© 2013 Diana Rasmussen

(from a long time ago in a faraway place)
We suffer in silence, Those in God’s fold,
When we live with Judas, in our not-quiet house.
To you he shows smiles, not a worry or care.
But we live with a traitor, all behind closed doors.
To you – words of peace flow and ebb from his mouth,
But the darkness come out when you’re not around.
F**k you b**ch! He shouts as he shoves you around,
Yelling and screaming, the insults abound.
“If only you’d this, If only you’d that”
His excuses are endless, he pulls them out of a hat.
Each day that goes on you stare in amazement,
As he smiles to the world, but throws things in your face.
Glass, wood, watch it shatter, you stare on in disbelief,
As he destroys all your things in front of you and the kids.
Your spirit he squashes, your dreams they are shattered,
Your hope has run out, when he asks “what is the matter?”
Destroy and devour, divide and deceive,
We cry out to God, Lord get me out of this place.
Every day that goes on, we keep the secret
The Devil’s alive and he lives in your house.
(Diana’s Disclaimer: Yes, I finally got help, and the kids and I are no longer with this man.  God sent Angels our way, and we are safe. Thank you Jesus!)


14 “Because he[a] loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
15 He will call on me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.
16 With long life I will satisfy him
and show him my salvation.”  Psalm 91:14-16 (NIV)


Dear Lord, You know all things and see all things.  We know that You have NOT given us a spirit of fear, but of love, and power, and a sound mind.  We aks You to shine Your light in the darkness, send your Angels to minister to anyone bound by fear.  Renew our minds as we ready Your Word. We know that your Word will accomplish that which You have set it out to do. Deliver us Lord,  for we acknowledge Your Name.   Lead us out of the darkness and into the  marvelous light.  Let Your light overpower any darkness and fear, in Jesus name.


Diana Rasmussen is a Faith Builder, Worship Leader, Veteran's wife, and a Certified Peer Specialist. At her blog Prayers and Promises she shares from her heart on how to find hope in this crazy world!

7 thoughts on “1984

  1. I am so thankful that the Lord delivered you from your pain… Father, in Jesus’ name, I cry out for my sister, and I ask You to make the darkness light. I ask that You would cover her and her children with Your strong arm of protection, and that You would deliver each one of them from any residue of fear, bitterness and anger that may have latched onto them. In Jesus’ mighty name, I loose Your truth and life over Diana and her children, so that they may walk in the fullness of Your joy and peace and I give You praise, Daddy, for the work You’ve already done in each of their lives, and for the work that You will continue to perfect until You return again. In Jesus’ wonderful name I pray, amen.

    Much love to you,

    1. Thank you Cheryl, I receive it, in Jesus name. It was very weird reading through my old journals, that seems like a lifetime ago. It only took 10 years for me to share about it…God is so good, I am amazed how He rescues us from all our fears and enemies. Set all your prisoners free Lord!

      Love you too sis,

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