It has been said that as a man thinks he is in his heart, so he is. If you think you are a victim, and refuse to take a step forward, you might stay a victim. Overcoming this mentality has taken me years. After living in domestic violence for years I had given away all my power – to the Abuser. It didn’t happen all at once, it was a little at a time. I worshipped him. I did whatever he said, or else I had to “pay the price”. I thought he would change. I was wrong. He didn’t want to change. It was me that neede to change. I had allowed myself to remain in an unsafe situation for too long.

I had to learn a new way to think. My thinker was broken. This was the first step for me in becoming whole. In my “infinite wisdom” I sought out self-help books. I had a whole library! Years later, I had to admit that my self-help was no help. In fact I got even more depressed.

i went to counselor after counselor next. Yes, this helped, but it always keep me living in the past and rehashing everything. I wanted a future! This was not my answer either.

Then I tried the 12 step meetings. Now maybe your experience was different, but mine was a nightmare. I was so naive. I really believed everything people said. Needless to say, after another 10 years of my life passed me by and another failed marriage, I left. Not everyone that goes to those meetings wants to get well. Some want to stay sick and use the meetings to justify their bad behavior. Lesson learned.

It wasn’t until I learned about Jesus and who he truly was the things started to change for me. Reading the Word and memorizing verses literally renewed my mind. Really, it was the only way that I learned how to stand up for myself and my children and be strong.

Today I am no longer a victim. I am victorious in Christ. And I and my kids are free from living in violence. Yes, it took time. But it was worth it. And I am not the same person I used to be. I am not a doormat. I am blessed, and loved, and cherished, and precious – and so are you.

There is a way out if you are living in domestic violence. Take a step and tell someone what is really going on behind closed doors at your house. You are worth it, whether the Abuser thinks so or not. He’s a liar anyway, don’t believe the garbage that comes out of his mouth. God is faithful and true, and He will sing over you!

 

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