(may trigger – be safe)
CYCLE OF PAIN
By Diana Rasmussen (from a long ago faraway place)
I’m tired of screaming, getting told to “F” you,
I’m tired of crying as his face turns blue.
His anger is killing me, from the one ‘supposed to love;
My life is shriveling, as he stamps his foot to the ground.
How long Lord, how long? Must I go around and around?
My hope has run out, and love went to hide.
My faith is now shivering, fear is all around;
Will it ever be over? Or will I die in this place?
Pushed way beyond anger, to numbness alone;
I’m falling again Lord, as he shoves his words down.
He calls me a b***h, says he’s leaving again,
Only two seconds later, asks “can we start over again?”
To which words do I cling? I’m losing my mind!
He respects not my time, my space, or my wants.
Time-outs don’t matter when your time’s not your own.
How long must I endure this endless cycle of pain?
You’ve given me freedom Lord, then why can’t he see;
That I am not his property?
My hope is in You Lord, You alone do I trust,
For You only are faithful, and You give me rest.
You’ve made me Your own Lord, I’m sealed by your kiss,
But Your Spirit he squelches, he just can’t resist.
My prayer for him Lord, is that You heal his rage;
Please do it quickly, I’m trapped in his cage.