This world is broken, it is not what it was supposed to be. People are broken, they sometimes choose to do evil. Innocent people get hurt. And I am broken. There are pieces of me all over the place some days. Like shattered glass, all over the floor. ”How did this happen?”, I ask myself. This isn’t how it was supposed to be. Can you relate?
Honestly, there are days I read some of your posts and just cry. I am so humbled by your hearts. And your openness to talk about it. I know a lot of us do this for healing; to put our thoughts and hearts on “paper”. It helps sort it all out. But sometimes even knowing the “why” doesn’t fix it. The brokenness is still there.
Yes, I know we can pray, and that God can heal. I could even give you a verse or two if you really wanted me to. I guess what I am weary of, is ignoring my shadow. Even when the sun shines, my shadow is still there. That’s the part of me that doesn’t want to do what God wants – or even wants to do what I want. That is the part of me that NEEDS God’s grace, – His unmerited favor. And that is the part that NEEDS God’s mercy – not getting what I deserve. And that is the part that NEEDS God’s forgiveness. I am not perfect. I am broken. How can I ask God to heal what I won’t even admit exists?
When I see your brokenness, it allows me to feel mine. I can identify with your pain. I have felt it in me – only I ignored it. I can say that you really get good at hiding it in some Christian circles, and in some families too. And I guess with friends, work, everywhere. We put on “masks” and play “chameleons”. Then someone asks you “How are you?” And you say “fine”.
You know what that stands for?
FINE = F***ked Up, Insane, Neurotic, and Emotional”
It is not my job to fix your pain, nor is it your job to fix mine. There are some things that only God can heal. And yes, He can, and He does. But He’s not finished with us yet….the painting isn’t done yet….a work I progress, as they say.
“When I can embrace my own brokenness,
I can identify with yours.
Ministry is sharing, not dominating;
Understanding, not theologizing;
Caring, not fixing.”
(From Brennan Manning book: Abba’s Child)
So, I guess tonight I just wanted to thank you all. You have touched my heart with your lives, your blogs, your challenges, and your victories. You give me hope, and remind me how blessed we all are.
REMEMBER, GOD BLESSES WHAT IS BROKEN…
GOD’S PROMISE TO YOU:
” Therefore I urge you to take nourishment, for this is for your survival, since not a hair will fall from the head of any of you.” And when he had said these things, he took bread and gave thanks to God in the presence of them all; and when he had broken it he began to eat. Then they were all encouraged, and also took food themselves.’( ACTS 27:34-36)
“ And as they were eating, Jesus took bread, blessed and broke it, and gave it to them and said, “Take, eat;[a] this is My body.” Then He took the cup, and when He had given thanks He gave it to them, and they all drank from it. (MARK 14:22-23 NKJV)
23 For I received from the Lord that which I also delivered to you: that the Lord Jesus on the same night in which He was betrayed took bread; 24 and when He had given thanks, He broke it and said, “Take, eat;[a] this is My body which is broken[b] for you; do this in remembrance of Me.” 25 In the same manner He also took the cup after supper, saying, “This cup is the new covenant in My blood. This do, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of Me.” ( 1CORINTHIANS 11:23-25 NKJV)
MY PRAYER FOR YOU:
You taught us what it was like to be broken – literally. You did not hide from the truth, but you declared it. Let us embrace our brokenness, so that we may bring that part to YOU. And protect us from living there too, we don’t want to live there; we just want to rest in You. Quiet our minds and our hearts Lord. Let us be still and know that You are God.
Let us hear You as you say, ” I love you, even the broken parts. You are my child, and I just want to spend time with you. I have wanted to tell you that for so long. You do not need to prove to yourself that you are loved. You already have my love, now rest in Me.” in Jesus’ Name.